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Baby, we'll take you any way we can get you!


Dag, you're quick on the draw! And ain't you a sweet thing! *blush*

Just so you know: you'll get me, now, sitting in an inflatable kiddie pool, because Kotex doesn't make the feminine napkin that can hold back this Niagara. I'm starting to remember why women complain about periods.


So, did you get her the PantiRose?


God, I wish I could find them here! For some unfathomable reason, in Charlottesville, VA, my haunt some years ago, every corner store sold them. They were crappy one-size-fits-all lace underwear rolled up to vaguely resemble a rosebud, and attached to the end of a plastic stem-and-leaves job. The plastic display bucket read: "The Pantirose! It's The Rose...She Can Wear!"

What do you say to a gift like that? "Oh, thank you, darling, for this ill-fitting cheap undergarment from Lucky Seven, vendor of off-brand porn and malt liquor! And it's only a little soiled around the edges! They're PERFECT!"

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