Got a Minute?

« Last Plane to Snarksville | Main | The Kind of Tired that Sleep Doesn't Take Away »



BULLSHIT. You are funny and kind, and good. There has NEVER been a time when I needed you that you didn't come through for me, and your loyalty is out the roof. I am not going to sit here and read these things, knowing full well that it's crap. You are the person I admire most in this world, and I adore you. Don't say that shit. Just. Don't. I love you. Consider that my cockslap to you.


Hey Leery -

Cut the melodrama and self-flagilation
down a tad! You sound like a kick-ass
woman to me and I read your blog with
glee and a deep joy that I will soon
be returning to Boston and the northeast,
where there is more snark and sarcasm
than here in the cheery midwest.
Besides, nobody should have to apoligize
for their family traditions. If the
slashing is OK with you and yours then
why shouldn't you enjoy? My sister and
I, we snark at others, and I LIVE for
visiting with her.

Yeah, we all wish we could be better
people, less selfish; I bet that even
the Dalai Lama wishes he could give
himself more freely when needed. If
that's what you want to do, good luck
with it. But please don't hide the
other stuff just because it sounds too
bald written down. I admire your guts and
your wit, and I need the laughter you


whoa, jo, i wouldn't take it that far. you were not an ass at all. and you got no ass at all. well, that's not true, you have a lovely booty. it just stinks. and i wouldn't get so down about this. chalk it up to hormones, but your guilt level seems excruciatingly high right now. let it go, boo.


I don't think you should consider unringing that bell. I do think harnessing some pain and turning into funny is how you can tell you're dealing with your shit. You did your (yer) sister a favor and she returned it. It shocked the shit out of me when I first read it. I knocked it around a few times and it IS funny. Demented, sick, REAL funny. Now, you have no idea who I am, so feel free to casually disregard this and all future posts, but know, now I begin to stalk you.


I think everyone's on vacation. Comments seem to be few and far between on several blogs.

I think you're too cool for school. Sarcasm is the greatest trait, snarkiness is awesome. But the real story her? How much your family can take and still laugh and love. That's amazing.


"What I am is selfish, self-centered, sometimes cruel and sometimes just stupid. I blunder around hurting people's feelings. I do not always give freely of myself when asked. I am irritable and uncharitable and preoccupied. I am an unpleasantish, unevolved person with enough butt zits to disqualify me from a career even in amateur porn."

Oh My God! You're Me!


Yeah, but you're hot.


... what I imagine to be a no-nonsense Midwestern housewifely exterior ...

See, that's what I love about you--your absolutely outrageous imagination.

And I'm not going to start in with you, telling you to stifle the self-flagellation. Hell, I've been waiting for you to join me in that action for too fucking long.


The family that snarks together stays together. ME and my mom used to work in the same building, and took lunches and breaks together with another coworker. She was always at the ready, ready to run that is, because she always thought our snarkiness was going to erupt into real fighting. Actually she thought our snarkiness was real fighting. Anywho. I love that word, by the way, snarky. Just be you, because thats the person we all love.


I just came across this...

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 22)

If you measure your success against your popularity, you'll come up far shorter than if you make no measurements at all. Think of your greatest professional triumph as a process of peeling back the layers of what obscures your true being. Allow the sense that you are being seen -- which you are, it is true -- guide you to a greater depth of revealing yourself, your ideas, your poetry and even your raw intensity. Have you not figured out that this is why you are so well loved, even if people have their misgivings at times? It's not your job to make everyone comfortable. It's merely to be real. True art is a matter of existence, not of product, and there are phases when you must exist in a form that you can neither perceive accurately, nor understand. In this time when so much is possible, remember that you don't have what it takes; you are what it takes.


Oh please, you are NOT an asshole. Maybe I missed the point here - because I do that a lot - but I was envious reading of the honesty between you and your sisters. I think it's refreshing to see families who don't feel like they're constantly walking on eggshells with one another.


Ditto what Juno said (Hi Juno!)

I think you're fabulous.


We all love the snarky! I have scientific proof for this: I posted a poll on my blog to see what everyone wanted to read about, and "rants and bitchiness" is the clear winner so far. Oddly, very few people want to read about poop, so I immediately posted an entry about my sad gastrointestinal status. Sometimes I am stupid, too. WE ALL ARE. We're human. We all do things we're ashamed of, we sometimes hurt the people we love the most, and everybody poops.

And cosmic cockslaps? I think you're mighty cheerful for someone who's had cosmic cockslap after cockslap for the last few years. You do not deserve another. The universe should bake you a pan of brownies, that's what I think.

Finally, perhaps you could try using some of your sister's Proactiv on your butt before you completely give up your dreams of amateur porn. (You know I love you, right?)



That's all I have to say about that.

Except maybe, pshaw.


You do know that we love you, right? Heck, I'm sure the snarkiness is why most of us stick around. Go easy on yourself, okay?


Okay, I may be arriving a bit late to all this, but what's "Proactiv"?

And why do you have a picture of a woman's anus?

Anyway, I love you, even if you are an asshole (which I highly doubt, by the way, but even if, even if).


I think it's time you revealed another deviant sexual behaviour thingie now.

You know, to endear yourself to us again!

Kidding, my love, kidding. We think you're tops. Can't figure out what sent you into this tailspin of self-loathing, but oh well. I do it meself, often enough.

Now snap the fuck out of it already.


Yeah, what all of them said.

Holy bejeezus, I love you Jo, my juicy pal. Maybe my rashy butt and your pimply butt can meet some day, huh?


Ditto from me -- I laughed and laughed at your post (and still want to see the pic -- does that make me a bad person?) and was happy for you that you have people in your life that you can laugh and joke about this with. It's the thing that keeps us sane. There's obviously support and kindness and gentleness there, too; we just need different things at different times...

Can you imagine how we could lessen our dependancy on foreign oil if we harnessed all our self-loathing IF energy? It's worth looking into...

The comments to this entry are closed.