SLUT

I self-identify as a slut.

And it doesn't matter what I'm doing (or not doing) with my vagina, or my hands, or my mouth right now, or this year, or the past two decades: I am a slut at heart. Because I get to do with my cunt and my hands and my mouth whatever the hell I want. And nobody else gets to say dick about it.

I decide. No one else. And I own my decisions and I am completely okay with every last one of them. 

And if Rush Limbaugh wants to call me a slut, that's fine, because for once in his stupid, stupid life, he'd be right.

Except being a slut doesn't make me any less worthy of things like medical care. And good manners. And basic human dignity. 

I know that the men of the Republican Party would largely disagree with that, but I don't care. The only way to rob that insult of its power is to say, yeah, you know what? I am a respectable married mother of two, a homeowner, a taxpayer, a voter, a regular visitor to an Abrahamic house of worship -- and I am a slut, down deep in my soul.

And you will take me seriously.

 

 

Comments

[Debbie]

Sing it, sister!!

[Tine]

Amen!

[Karen]

Joanna, I agree that Rush was far out of line to refer to or to imply that Ms. Fluke was a slut or prostitute. However, I've been reading your blog for a long time-actually yours was one of the first IF blogs I ever read-and I wonder where were you when Maher referred to Sarah Palin as a cunt? And where were you when the DNC threw Hillary Clinton under the bus?

Misogyny is alive and well on both sides of the aisle. And all women need to speak up about it every single time. Not just when Republican men do it.

[Jo]

Where was I -- well, I wasn't paying much attention, to be honest. You know what? I'm not really much of a politics blogger, and I don't tend to discuss that stuff much because I don't feel equipped to cover all the subtleties of that huge volume of information.

I agree that all women need to speak up about it, every time. But...they did. And do. It doesn't work to invoke other incidences of public misogyny -- those things don't lessen the nastiness -- and importance -- of the Rush thing.

[MFA Mama]

YES!

[kara]

I had a chat with my Rush-lovin dad about this very issue and he threw the Maher Palin-is-a-cunt jab back at me. I admitted I hadn't heard of that one. I just plead for more civil discourse on both sides. It's beyond ridiculous now. Completely agree with Karen. Sadly, I believe that my dad is a lost cause to the tea-baggers and Rush-right but he did admit that he would be loath to call his daughter a slut or a prostitute for (gasp) being on the pill since I was 15 for having endometriosis and even more shockingly having my catholic employer pay for it!

[mollysvote]

Fuckin brilliant! Attending WOW2012 in London and this is the truth. Women
should own it. Take all these labels and turn them right back at them!

[Renee Bouillon]

Amen!

I am a SLUT and damn proud of it. I may not be from the USA but I feel the same as this is going on all over the world. Women need to stand up and DO something about it.

[Liza]

This was brilliant.

And to all the people -- who have been complaining on my FB page about this too -- that claim those of us who are mad now should also have been mad about Maher calling Palin a cunt: You aren't wrong to be mad at Maher, but no one has the energy to be outraged at every single outrageous thing that happens. Complaining that we weren't mad enough before is just an attempt to distract from the outrage at hand.

[Jo]

Amen, Liza.

One thing does not negate the other thing.

[snozma]

I was making up joke things to say. I wish I could say these on facebook. But consider these sentences coming from a woman:

I've had sex A LOT of times.

I love sex.

I had sex and I loved it. In fact, I'm going to do it again and again!

I had sex and I want some more.

I want to have sex (sometimes)!!!!

It's so hilarious. You can make up dozens of SHOCKING SLUTTY THINGS that apply to like, ALMOST EVERY WOMAN who doesn't hate sex.

To be a good woman, you have to despise sex completely. But then your husband will leave you--and he has every right to cheat on you (by that logic).

It would be funny but it is insane.

[schmutzie]

I just wanted to let you know that this piece is being featured in Five Star Friday: http://www.schmutzie.com/fivestarfriday/2012/3/29/five-star-fridays-183rd-edition-is-brought-to-you-by-carl-ju.html.

[Nidia]

Amazing Kim, like the OP, I keep thinking what heappned to me wasn't really attempted rape, because rape is something horrible that happens in dark alleys and I wasn't hurt that badly, and what difference does it make, and rape is such an awful word anyway and and and Only recently did I start to consider what heappned to me as a man setting me up for rape. After we'd discussed my wanting to wait on having sex; after he had described how, if he wanted to rape someone and not get caught, he'd get a woman really drunk (but that would be wrong, he was quick to assure me); we went out drinking till I was too drunk to stand, and he tried to rape me when I couldn't fight back. (And I've just edited that sentence twice to make it say what actually heappned because I wasn't hurt, and he didn't mean anything by it, and I'm just casting suspicion on him and and and .)I tried to write about this a while ago but the guy in question is reading my blog now, as is one of our mutual friends, and I don't feel trying to defend myself again But he didn't mean anything by it and he was sorry afterwards! (Yeah sorry I started screaming and crying. Because after I stopped crying, he dumped me for not having sex with him.)It's been over 10 years. But I still can't call it what it was.

[Lim]

And that's the really hlirrboe thing about it it's just so common. And the women I've talked to about this over the past few days who have similar stories all talk a feeling of not wanting to take away from real rape victims.I wrote once a long time ago about how we're seriously dis-served, as a culture, by having rape on television always be presented as Dark Alley, At Night, Creeping Stranger, blah, because it does create an image of what rape and reactions to rape are supposed to look like. Since the only narrative I see on t.v. is hlirrboe trama , the fact that I haven't felt like the walking wounded for most of my adult life leaves me thinking it wasn't real attempted rape, or I'd be more traumatized.Ah, I am speaking to the choir. But I do <3 this choir some days.

[Sonia]

Very important sasmege! A sure way to avoid any confusion between two people and creating a respectful and healthy approach from the word go. Great advice for guys how to be a good lover !